Happily Even After: It's a Choice!

I've been in a little denial with this diagnosis, like I can't believe this is happening to me and this is not just a statement. I actually can't believe this is happening to me. I mean, most days feel like I'm still in shock, waiting for that moment when I'm going to break down and cry on the shower like in a film. It hasn't happened. And I also feel like I'm way too calm when I'm telling people about my cancer and the first thing most people say is wow, you're so calm, you're handling this so well. Now I've been wondering how am I supposed to be handling it? So I think, what do you tell your widows? What do you tell everyone about grieving? Of course there's no right or wrong way to grieve. There's no right or wrong way to handle a terminal cancer diagnosis. Tell people how you feel, do what's going to make you happy. But the thing is I don't really know how I feel. I feel like I did when Tom died I just lost, lost with all of these emotions and not knowing how to process them. But the one thing that I will do differently this time is reach out to someone for help. I just don't think I can wing this cancer thing like I did being a widow. So, even though I don't quite know how I feel yet, nothing has made me feel more like a cancer patient than my first treatment. With that. It's really started to sink in. I do, however, know what's going to make me happy and how I want to spend the remainder of my life. Of course, I want to spend all the time I possibly can with family and friends, just making sure that they all know how much I love them, even though it's hard for me to always express Because soft and mushy just really sent my thank. I want to dedicate as much time as possible to this podcast. I know I'm not the best with words and I know that I'm not the most eloquent on social media, but I feel like I've always been more of a I can show you better than I can tell you type of person. The thing is, you don't need someone to remind you over and over again how being a widow is so tough, so sad, so depressing, so lonely and so out of the other widow things. You already know that. I'm not going to be another reminder for you. I want to be a different reminder for you. I want to remind you of who you are what you are capable of. I want you to know that you are more than just a widow. I want you to know that life after loss can be absolutely beautiful, and I want you to know that you can still have the life that you imagined or hell just create you a new one. And I want you to know that I truly believe with all my heart that every widow deserves a happily even after. Even now, with a terminal cancer diagnosis, I'm not giving up on my happy ending Because, after all, love is not dead. Love is not dead, just my husband.